Can the first year be over yet???

All the books, all the experts, all the other parents say it over and over again, like a broken record. "The first year of having a baby is the hardest". It couldn't be more true...or at least I hope so. When you, as a couple, are used to the spontaneous lifestyle, the late evening BBQ's, the nights out, the movie date nights, the staying in bed in the morning - and then you throw in a baby, who winds up dictating your every move, it can be a rough adjustment. I've had to look at my husband as not just a spouse anymore, but a father, and vice versa. The evenings are no longer considered "wind down" time after work, but a mad scramble to get the baby bathed and fed and then asleep. For us stay at home moms, the adjustment can be even more difficult. Feeling isolated from the outside world, often feeling lonley and disconnected. Where girls lunches and break time gossips used to be, is now the place of playmat time, baby talk and nursing and rocking to sleep. For us unlucky ones, whos children don't even come close to sleeping through the night, we have begun to understand more clearly the term of being exhausted. Throw in a colicky baby and my case of spinal meningitis, and you have a tough fucking year. All those books, experts and other parents also say "but it's all worth it and you won't change it for a thing". And that, too, is true. Having a child has been the most amazing thing I've ever done. Being fortunate enough to stay at home has given me the chance to build an unbreakable bond with my son. Have a colicky baby who cried nonstop for months taught me a level of patience and stregnth I thought I could never obtain, and will make any other baby I choose to have seem like a piece of cake. Having been diagnosed with spinal meningitis when Vincent was 3 months and my ability to still take care of him by myself showed me that I can do anything. It has made me more proud of myself than anything else to date. You have to find the beauty in the madness. The hardest times are also the most rewarding, and show you just what kind of person you can actually be. A strong woman, a good mother, and a loving wife. Although it's difficult, you have to look at that glass...take a good long look at it and you have to decide whether it's half full or half empty. The way you look at that glass will define your life, and especially your attitude as a mother. My glass is half full...today at least...